Year opens with a lovely aloha

Caddie's Role:  The holiday season drew to a close abruptly last Thursday when my player, Retief Goosen, drove into the PGA …

Caddie's Role:  The holiday season drew to a close abruptly last Thursday when my player, Retief Goosen, drove into the PGA Tour's new year. Caddies and players approached the Kapalua course on foot for the first time all week, having had the luxury of petrol carts till then.

With some severe undulation on the Plantation course, there was some speculation about which caddies were unlikely to make it back to the clubhouse without assistance. Okay, it may be a hilly course, but for the half-mile walk from the fifth green to the sixth tee there was transport. They also drove us up a few other steep inclines between shots. But any caddie who was not up to this mild cardiovascular task should start thinking about another, less strenuous profession.

The tournament was an ideal start to the year. I was staying close to where my boss was, so it suited us that I picked him up each morning to bring him to the course. The bonus, on the other end of the trip, was that I got to valet park the car at the main entrance to the clubhouse and wander on down to the caddie shack without any parking problems.

Another big plus in Maui was the almost perfect weather. A forecast of 26°C and no rain for the week meant we could leave the umbrella and rain gear out of the bag. For those used to carrying their bag, you will understand the advantage of dropping that marginal weight.

READ SOME MORE

Oh yeah, and there was guaranteed money.

Given the general air of well-being on the beautiful island, it was no surprise to discover there is a Maui Wellness Institute dedicated to the enrichment of life, vitality and well-being with the spirit of aloha.

As luck would have it for us cads, some of this spirit made its way down to the caddie-shack in the form of Dr Gloria Polakof. Gloria was stationed in the caddie-room to give us weary bag-toters some "omni- rejuvenation". Gary Planos, the vice-president of resort operations in Kapalua, obviously has an affinity with us porters. It was his suggestion that we use carts and benefit from the healing powers of the Maui Wellness Institute.

The caddie-room smelt like a sorcerer's den by Thursday morning, with the rich aroma of Gloria's potions penetrating the more traditionally stale air of the bag-room.

The complementary massage, the golf shirts and lunch provided every day made for a welcoming start to the new year. Although we were not invited to the gala dinner on Friday night at the swanky Ritz Carlton, we were allowed into the after- dinner show of the ageing rock band Chicago.

A potentially dangerous lure for festive caddies was the free bar that went with the show. But the lack of enthusiasm for the star billing - without their founding, inspirational lead singer - meant most cads didn't hang around too long.

Lionel Richie, I was reliably informed, was much better entertainment last year.

Planos had introduced himself to me using my first name earlier in the week. I was most impressed by the hospitality extended even to a mere bag-toter. Apparently Planos

got into university through a caddie scholarship. No wonder he had such empathy with us cads.

Maui is definitely a holiday island and many people who come here return frequently. Many of the volunteers for the event have come here regularly since the event began six years ago. Most of the pro-am competitors are also mainland Americans on a week's vacation in Hawaii.

Here's how it works. If you have loads of spare cash or are famous then you can play in the Mercedes pro-am. Forty places are reserved for celebrities. We were paired with Kyle MacLachlan, the actor. Kyle's last performance was as Harold Pinter's Caretaker in New York. It seemed like he was stuck in the role as caretaker. I don't mean from a golfing point of view, but his accent was definitely not American. He admitted that it was an "estuary" English accent he was trying to use as the "caretaker". This was the accent he was playing golf with in Hawaii last week.

His co-star in the cult 1980s film Blue Velvet, Dennis Hopper, played with Ernie Els, in his regular American accent apparently.

If you were not one of the 40 invited celebrities then you were forking out up to $12,000 for the pleasure of a round with a top professional.

For the top deal you got seven nights in the resorts. Both packages included a two-day amateur event, the pro-am, private hospitality privileges, free golf and tennis for the week, access to the sky boxes at the finishing hole, tournament passes and a "tee-pack". In this was: Burberry and Club Glove duffles (i.e., travel bags), the new Titleist 983 driver, a Bettinardi putter, Ashworth and Tommy Bahama shirts, Tifanny crystal, a silk blanket with embroidered pillow covers and other gifts.

If you were unlucky you ended up playing with someone you never heard of. Last Saturday, we got to play with somebody everyone has heard of, Tiger Woods. He is the perfect playing partner once the crowds are not too big. There were no pretensions, no arrogance, just a very talented and respectful playing partner.

The working holiday moves on to Honolulu this week.

Colin Byrne

Colin Byrne

Colin Byrne, a contributor to The Irish Times, is a professional caddy