“Ireland stands at a crossroads,” Jack Chambers declared, striking an ominous note at the start of his budget speech.
Takes one to know one.
Because in a strange coincidence, the Minister for Public Expenditure was speaking from the middle of the crossroads he now shares with the rest of the Fianna Fáil party.
“How we choose to invest, plan and manage our economic affairs today will shape our country’s future,” he told the Dáil, trying to sound sure-footed on the financial front after a series of horrendous missteps on the political side.
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Chambers of Commerce didn’t offer any insights into how Fianna Fáil might choose to shape the party’s future after its woeful presidential election campaign imploded on Sunday night.
Saving himself for Wednesday’s big parliamentary party showdown, perhaps.
Members will be demanding answers from leader Micheál Martin and deputy leader Chambers on how they managed to make such an unmerciful hames of the process of selecting a suitable candidate to contest the presidential election.
Micheál and Jack strong-armed TDs and senators into nominating Jim Gavin and were his most enthusiastic cheerleaders until the proverbial hit the fan. Then they couldn’t run away from him fast enough.
Fianna Fáil is hurting.
It’s bad enough that Jim Gavin’s face and name will remain on the ballot paper to taunt them all when they slink in to vote on October 24th. And just to compound their misery, when party members walked through the Kildare Street gates on Tuesday for the budget statements, the lamp-post directly outside was adorned with a big Gavin for President poster.
The Opposition and everyone else are knocking great enjoyment out of the drama, which thoroughly overshadowed the usual budget day hoopla.
Already riveted by the ongoing upheavals as Micheál and Jack attempt to spread the blame and as a few backbench scouts began breaking cover to fire darts at the leadership, onlookers were rubbing their hands at the prospect of a political bloodbath in the parliamentary party rooms.
“Oh, what a time to be alive!” one observer chirruped at a passing Soldier of Destiny, who replied: “Being dead doesn’t seem like such a bad option at the moment.”
Could things get any worse?
Well, they very much could.
There was no turkey and ham on the menu this year. A terrible oversight. The first time in 32 years that turkey and ham and all the trimmings hasn’t been on offer in the canteen.
It really was a bad day for Fianna Fáil.
The morning didn’t start well. Cork East TD James O’Connor issued a stinging statement saying former Dublin GAA manager Gavin should never have been the party’s candidate and was only selected as a result of the “extensive pressure” put on TDs and senators by the leader and deputy leader.
“Elevating him one day and then throwing him under a bus the next has to be the most unceremonious dumping on a party candidate in modern Irish political history.”
When the budget day business began at lunchtime, the Government benches were packed, but there was no sign of Deputy O’Connor.
He was gone for some time, but eventually surfaced, taking a seat outside the railings in the area reserved for visiting members of the Seanad.
It turns out he had been out on the plinth unburdening himself to a reporter for RTÉ’s Six One news alongside a number of his colleagues who were in varying states of upset.
“Let down by the party hierarchy,” Cork South-Central’s Seamus McGrath said.
Back inside, Chambers of Commerce looked miserable while Paschal Donohoe, the other half of the Government’s budget day double act, breezed through his 45-minute statement.
“Our debt ratio is moving in the right direction and has almost halved since I delivered my first budget to the house in 2016,” he said.
There were few surprises, but then most of what the Minister for Finance had to say was leaked in advance. That’s the way it is done now.
And so to Jack Chambers, who may not have 10 years of experience under his belt, but at least he can say he has a bungled presidential election campaign to his name.
And while Paschal’s son Oscar, who was in the distinguished visitors gallery with the rest of his family, may have been on the winning side with Na Fianna in last weekend’s Dublin senior football semi-final, Jack threw the man who coached Dublin to six All-Irelands under a bus on Tuesday.
He wins the GAA bragging rights contest.
Despite these achievements, he looked nervous, taking a big gulp of water before he launched into his statement. For some reason, the Taoiseach, who was sitting next to him, also took a big swig of water.
The Minister for Public Expenditure, Infrastructure, Public Service Reform and Digitalisation raced through his script.
Few surprises from him either due to the well-established leak protocol.
The Opposition seemed content to let him talk, rarely intervening. Maybe they thought he was suffering enough.
There was some resistance when he announced “a permanent reduction of €500 in the student contribution fee to support students facing rising living expenses”.
Opposition TDs laughed.
“That’s a €500 increase!” Sinn Féin’s Matt Carthy shouted.
Minister for Culture Patrick O’Donovan allowed himself a fleeting smile when Jack said his €433 million allocation to broadcasting will include provision for the “continued delivery of the reform and transformation agenda in RTÉ”.
In other words: the green light for Patrick to continue persecuting RTÉ.
And then a poignant line from Jack.
“It is important to remember that learning doesn’t end with childhood. It can be a lifelong journey for us all.”
How true.
Micheál Martin was lost in his thought.
Once the two main speeches were done and the spokespeople for the main Opposition parties delivered their replies, the chamber cleared.
Speakers took turns to lambast the Government for broken promises, missed opportunities and looking after the few at the expense of the many.
Not until very late in the day did anyone reference Fianna Fáil’s election “omnishambles”, as Aontú’s Peadar Tóibín put it, while wondering how it must have affected Jack’s budget preparations.
He was the Director of Elections.
Meanwhile, failed election hopeful Maria Steen was calling for the election to be cancelled due to Gavin dropping out of the race.
As her supporters never tire of telling us, Maria is a qualified barrister, so she should know the constitutional requirements about the date of presidential elections.
