Twickenham will never change for me.
Strolling up to RFU headquarters on Sunday I know the same uncomfortable feeling will creep to the surface. You don't feel respected. An amphitheatre designed to intimidate. That's who they are; 'the mighty England welcoming Irish lambs to the slaughter' is the only way they know how to play hosts.
That inbuilt confidence is personified by the sound that emanates from this rugby cathedral. You’ve heard the echo of their song.
During my career Irish players, to a man, chose to stand and fight the English. What we learned was the bully will (eventually) buckle under the very pressure intended for us.
Their unbeatable mindset at Twickenham – held by the players and 80,000 wax jackets – can slowly dissolve over 80 minutes. Winning there in 2004 laid the foundation to bury this perception, as it provided the belief that drove victories in 2006 and 2010. Games that can be summed up by iconic moments in Irish sport: Girv's try, Shaggy's long stretch and Tommy Boooowwwwe.
Each win only came after enormous punishment was inflicted upon our confrontational pack of forwards, but each man hung in when they needed to and kept coming back for more. That’s what it is all about at Twickenham. Whatever you are made of gets laid bare for all to see.
That’s why we dig into our Irishness on this day more than any other. We must. We must to avoid the presumption of an English victory becoming reality.
Regardless of the English personnel, sustained physicality is guaranteed every time they take to this field. Wave after wave of attack must be repelled. Discipline and skullduggery will both be needed.
Otherwise, what we witnessed through our fingers last August could revisit this Ireland team. I don't think the group will concede 57 points for the rest of their time in the jersey but here's where it can reoccur.
I was unbeaten at Twickenham until March 17th, 2012. That Paddy's Day still follows many of us around. As all the Triple Crown talk rises to the surface this week, Keith Earls, Johnny Sexton, Peter O'Mahony and Cian Healy might pause to remember what happened eight years ago.
It ranks as one of my worst days in a green jersey. Hooked off after 48 minutes – for an outhalf named Ronan O’Gara – Deccie Kidney subsequently took the time to tell explain his decision. “We needed another kicker on the field, Gordon, we had to try something different to gain territory because the game plan wasn’t working.”
Paul O'Connell and Brian O'Driscoll were not part of the squad that travelled. Also, Mike Ross left the field in agony before half-time as the English scrum, Alex Corbisiero in particular, tortured Tom Court, a loosehead forced to tighthead before law changes allowed two props on the bench.
Miles away from the scrum disintegrations, I found myself trapped in a self-inflicted torture chamber. I've always loved going into battle alongside Earlsey but we struggled to cope with the directness of an Owen Farrell, Brad Barritt, Manu Tuilagi midfield.
Executive decision
Deccie showed decency to give an explanation for yanking me off eight minutes into the second half, but we both knew I hadn’t done my job. It doesn’t matter what type of ball a number 12 is getting, he or she must eke out the hard yards. Sure, Sexton hardly had this spacious platform but I failed to squeeze the necessary inches past Farrell and Barritt.
Also, against that centre pairing, you tackle around the boot laces or you may as well be wake boarding.
At one stage, when Barritt, with Tuilagi behind him, drove myself and Johnny into our own 22, I could hear Nigel Owens screaming "release 12". Our defence was fractured so I took the executive decision to give them three rather than seven points. Manu gave me a good long pat on the ceann as Farrell lined up a penalty that made it 9-3 on 33 minutes. Considering the downpour and miserable look on the faces of the Irish forwards, it felt like 30-3.
We kept going but so did they.
Look back to better days and you’ll always find a flawless set piece.
For example, Tommy's late try in 2010. Jonny Wilkinson's drop goal put them 16-13 ahead with 10 minutes to go. We had lost Brian, after his head collided with Paulie's knee, which meant I couldn't go off when my right eye welded shut. Dr Eanna Falvey was at my side and after establishing I wasn't concussed – "Where are you? What's the score?" – he burst the swelling with his thumb. And the blind could see. Pure agony, I'd have sought revenge if Eanna wasn't a former super heavyweight national champion.
“There’s nobody left, kid. You are staying on.”
Back into the line I went without the luxury of hanging on. We needed a try so we needed possession deep in English territory.
A similar scenario will happen on Sunday: Swing Low was booming around the ground as O’Connell ruined Danny Care’s first ruck ball off the restart. The box kick went in field.
From the next phase one of our crowd – I'm pretty sure it was Leo Cullen! – blocked Wilkinson's line kick so the ball bobbled over halfway. Geordan Murphy slid on it as O'Gara did what Wilkinson wanted to do, finding touch in the England 22. When O'Connell ruined Luis Deacon's attempt at a clean take, England were forced to cough up a lineout.
The crowd, while still extremely noisy, were no longer singing.
The next move was made for Bowe but it needed perfect off the top possession from O’Connell and the running threat of Tomás O’Leary to keep the defence honest. Tommy picked a magic line for his 74th minute match-winning try at Twickenham. Roy of the Rovers stuff.
Not so fast. We still had a long way still to go. After near meltdown in Cardiff a year previously, our outhalf broke up the premature celebration in England's in goal. Paul caught the low hanging fruit from Wilkinson's restart . . .
Late try
All this detail is being relayed for two reasons: firstly, we fully intend to dine out on such games until our days are numbered. Secondly, the detail matters; each seemingly small O’Connell and O’Gara contribution is how winning gets done at Twickenham.
Every single battle matters. At Twickenham it's about finishing the job you started. So, Rory Best piloted the O'Connell maul over halfway and O'Leary's perfect box kick was caught by Mark Cueto a footstep outside the England 22. Andrew Trimble, in for O'Driscoll and probably still cold, made his tackle. Just doing his job. Ben Foden almost skinned Cian Healy in midfield.
The horror of France winger Vincent Clerc's late try at Croke Park three years earlier presumably dropped into the mind of every Irish person present but Cian did his job. Next, O'Connell met Joe Worsley on the gainline, soaking the English flanker's carry in order to arch his body over the ball and steal some valuable seconds. I stuck my head into this collision until hearing "Release!" This time, with England having over 50 metres still to travel, I obeyed.
That should be enough effort to win any game. Not at Twickenham, where three minutes defending a four-point lead feels like a lifetime. The Steve Borthwick pack marched within six metres of our try line. The maul collapsed in a heap on top of Rory Best. Ireland scrum.
We could hear The Fields. Every green voice in the stadium bellowed it out. The Irish like their singing, said Steve Hansen after last year's World Cup quarter-final, but it can have a profound effect on the players. Jamie Heaslip did his job, picking quickly from a back-pedalling scrum as O'Gara barely found touch.
Back came England. I could swallow another thousand words telling you about the last two minutes. In an exact replica of 2006 – those torturous moments after Shane Horgan’s try – we only escaped thanks to Cian’s heroic rip for Jamie to scuttle the ball into touch.
That’s how Ireland win at Twickenham. Navigate all the variables that make an English victory a certainty before kick-off. Take your scores when they are going.
Most of the current Irish squad know how both days, victory and defeat, feel
I never won there again in a green jersey (Leinster did scoop a Heineken Cup in 2012). They will get you in the end, but for a shiny few years Ireland had the run of the place.
Presumably, this week, Andy Farrell and Johnny Sexton will have hairs standing up on the back of player necks with their call to arms. But self motivation should not be a problem. Not for Cian, Keith, Pete and Johnny. Nor those who were twice humiliated by England in 2019.
Most of the current Irish squad know how both days, victory and defeat, feel. Except for Caelan Doris and Ronán Kelleher. I'd like to see both of them in the starting XV. They are the long-term investments at number eight and hooker, they bring ball carrying and poaching that this team needs.
Lingering concern
It's easy to write that, and I do believe it, but Farrell turned to CJ Stander and Rob Herring when the young Leinster duo were injured.
Stander’s confidence is reflected in his improved skill set –eight passes in two matches is more than we saw from him throughout 2019 – while Herring has been vital to a well-functioning lineout.
Doris for Peter O'Mahony, with Stander moving to six, will eventually happen but the Munster captain is refusing to step aside. I'm also happy enough with Kelleher arriving alongside Dev Toner for the last 20 minutes. I'm sure this 22 -year-old hooker is filled with confidence by Dev's presence.
My lingering concern is the battle may be decided before the Irish bench is unleashed.
Anyway, back we go to Twickenham, this time playing second fiddle for ITV. I’ll have the same head on me Sunday as I did as a player. I don’t enjoy it because the opposition is England. If Ireland don’t match them physically, they will be overwhelmed. Still don’t feel respected. That’s just the nature of the beast. Losing at Twickenham is not part of the equation. It has to be ripped from their hands, violently and accurately to the very last breath.
***
The Legends Game on Saturday evening at The Stoop will be the first and potentially last rugby outing of my forties (feeling good despite crossing the invisible line into middle age last week). It's for a very important cause – the Tom Smith testimonial committee – so do come along as I unfurl a strict "no contact" approach to playing rugby. Don't worry, I've been working on my passing.
