AMERICA:CHRISTMAS MAY be more than five months away but hundreds of Santas are parking their sleighs in Kansas City this weekend to exchange tips on everything from bleaching your beard and buying a belt to getting a job at the local shopping mall. They are planning the biggest Santa Claus parade in history, reindeer games, and a Mrs Claus fashion show, as well as a visit to a local baseball game.
The annual meeting of the Amalgamated Order of Real-Bearded Santas is happening under a cloud of bitterness and recrimination, however, as splits within the Santa community have spilled over into legal action and mutual charges of heavy-handed tactics. Dozens of Santas have stomped out of the group, accusing its leaders of ethical violations and of "engaging in un-Santa like dialogue" on the Elf Net website.
Founded in 1994 by California Santa Tim Connaghan, the Amalgamated Santas has one basic rule - all Santas must have a real beard. The group's newsletter features advertisements for red suits, gloves and other essential accessories, as well as advice for budding Santas.
"Your breath is the most important item during your visit," warned Santa Fuzzy in a recent issue. "If your breath is bad, the whole visit will be bad. The children will not want to hug you. They won't even want to sit on your lap."
For Santa Jac Grimes, being Santa is not just for Christmas but is a year-round commitment that involves maintaining a high standard of public behaviour, especially in front of children, and careful personal grooming.
"You may be Santa because of what's in your heart but you're known as Santa because of what's on your face," he says.
"Keep your beard and hair neatly trimmed, even if it is long and you need to bleach, get those roots done and condition, condition, condition!"
The trouble at the Amalgamated Santas started last year when a 47-year-old Santa called Nick Trolli joined the board and drew attention to what he saw as Santa Connaghan's ethical conflicts. Santa Connaghan was acting as booking agent for 200 Santas and last August he signed a $25,000 contract with a Hollywood production company to act as a consultant on a film about the group's annual convention.
Amid accusations that he was profiting from his leadership of the Amalgamated Santas, a boardroom heave saw the founder resign along with half the board. Trolli took over as chairman and immediately made clear that he was not a Santa to be messed with, stripping 20 Santas of their membership for maligning other Santas on Elf Net.
According to the Wall Street Journal, the dispute turned physical earlier this year when a Santa who had been banished from Elf Net tried to crash a board meeting of Amalgamated Santas but was blocked by Jeff Germann, a 6ft 4 in 300-pound Santa.
"The interloping Santa, Ric Erwin of Laguna Niguel, California, says he planned to videotape the private meeting at the request of Santas who couldn't be there," the paper reported.
"He pushed his way past Mr Trolli and ended up face-to-face with Mr Germann near the meeting room filled with Santas. Mr Erwin says Mr Germann "used his elbow to bounce me off the wall".
Mr Germann says he didn't touch Mr Erwin. Mr Trolli says Mr Erwin "headed into him like a linebacker". Mr Erwin was escorted out by security guards.
As authorities in Kentucky and Pennsylvania investigate claims of dubious accounting at Amalgamated Santas, the splinter Fraternal Order of Real Bearded Santas is recruiting energetically, even welcoming Mrs Clauses, designer beard Santas and elves as associate members.
Meanwhile, Santa Connaghan, who is chancellor of the International University of Santa Claus, which offers one- and two-day Santa courses, is expanding its alumni association, the Red Suit Society, into a rival to the Amalgamated Santas.
This time, he is taking no chances, making clear to all prospective members that "the chancellor reserves the right to accept, decline or remove anyone he feels does not qualify or no longer qualifies" for membership.
