I’ve said out loud in my kitchen, a few times, that I’d like to get involved in coaching one of my kids’ teams one day.
Because saying it out loud is like testing the water here – either a passing child, or husband, is likely to offer a take on what you’ve just said. Or ignore it altogether and view it as just your most recent whim deserving of as much attention as that time you thought you’d go on the stepper in front of Classic EastEnders for the duration of an entire episode every day, which was going to be long enough to get your daily steps in, totally underestimating how much it would make your thighs burn. Plus, turns out it’s boring after a few minutes.
So, now I need a new fitness regime. Anyway.
This desire to get involved in coaching the kids has been around for a while. Years of being on one pitch sideline or another means I’ve seen all sorts – the good, the bad and the downright he’s-lost-the-plot coaches. And I’ve promised myself, once I no longer needed to run from one pitch or activity to another, with one or other of the kids, I will. That day has not yet come, though I explain to himself and with him already being a coach, and us having millions of kids, the juggle would be impossible I say, so it’ll have to wait a bit longer, I think.
I’ve seen all sorts of kids’ coaches – the good, the bad and the downright he’s-lost-the-plot
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But didn’t it only come to pass some weeks back that a message went out in one of the WhatsApp groups saying they were a bit short on coaches’ availability one particular weekend and any parental help would be much appreciated. “There’s your chance now to volunteer, Jen,” I thought before dismissing the idea out of hand and convincing myself, for no good reason, they really only meant the dads.
Was I, the woman who is not at all shy about offering her opinion on children’s sports and the things that need to change, suddenly feeling a bit shy about helping out at coaching? It seemed I was a bit, but just because it really only ever seemed to be the dads who coached.
[ Jen Hogan: It’s a pity so many adults ruin sports for childrenOpens in new window ]
Seems visibility mattered in that moment, even to this sports-loving adult. So, you can be pretty certain it matters to sports playing girls too. And as I chatted with former Munster and Ireland international Keith Earls recently, it’s something he’s conscious of, especially with three daughters.
Keith’s three daughters play GAA and soccer. Of course they do, we all might think. Sure, isn’t their dad a sporting superstar. Except he wasn’t the only driver in getting them very involved in sports. His wife, Edel, who played camogie with Limerick underage, and soccer in school, was also very keen their daughters played sports.
Women’s sports still has a lot of catching up to do to get to where men’s sports are, Keith feels, “but when you think of all the girls that are playing sports now, you’d imagine that when they get older and they start having kids, they’re going to be sporty,” he says. Time will help, he reckons, because “girls’ sport is getting popular now and it’s getting lots of coverage, which means more girls will be into sport”.
The time aspect is something I can see coming good in the future, here too. Because perception is everything. I couldn’t convince my daughter to have the same grá for sport I had growing up, unfortunately, but her little brothers love it and they see no difference between boys and girls playing. They’re as likely to get behind the women’s international teams as the men’s, and see no difference in playing football with their girl cousins or their boy cousins. Sport is for everyone in their eyes, and fun to play with everyone.
The difference is their exposure.
My bedroom wall, growing up, was covered in posters of the Irish and Liverpool football teams – the men’s of course. Keith is conscious that his daughters need female role models. “Everyone talks about Ronaldo and Messi,” he says, “but my little girl has Katie McCabe above her bed”. She’s “a realistic goal for my daughter”.
And it matters that we have this visibility, as a recent study revealed that 43 per cent of people feel that not knowing anyone who is playing is a barrier to attending a female sports event.
“It’s great to see female coaches as well. Some females know more than the bloody men,” Keith continued as we chatted about how to change things. He’d touched a nerve without realising.
He’s right though, because we all know a woman’s place is on the sports pitch, and in the coaches’ group.