The Great Barrier Reef – the single biggest living organism on earth – is home to astounding sea life. Combine it with five-star luxury and it's a captivating holiday for MAL ROGERS
THE NEIGHBOURS were kicking up an awful racket. As I opened the doors of my veranda to breathe in the soft tropical air, a zephyr blowing off the Great Barrier Reef rustled the jacaranda trees. In the background the cacophony continued. Crickets, cicadas, katydids, an unidentifiable bird, a family of frogs: all kept up a steady soundtrack to the warm, scented night.
Gin and tonic in hand, I settled on the patio the better to enjoy this intoxicating sound, an electric hum that separates the tropics from the silent nights of our northerly climes.
I nodded wisely to myself as I lingered over a third drink. “Stridulation.” Yes, that was the scientific term for the sound a cricket makes. And a complicated equation relates the frequency of stridulation to temperature – a bloke down at the research station in the south of the island told me that.
The easy-going pace of life on Lizard Island and the baroque extravaganza of its wildlife promote such speculation. After all, the Great Barrier Reef, the world’s single biggest living organism, is outside the front door of the research station. Turn left just beyond the landing strip and you can’t miss it: it’s bigger than Ireland.
The reef is the work of several billion coral polyps whose conscientious application to duty over 18 million years has built a home for pelagics ranging from turtles to stingrays – and more than 1,500 species of fish. This is ichthyology central.
On a fairly average day you can spot a good number of representatives of these species: gold-striped butterfly fish, red bass, clownfish (yup, Nemo), spangled emperors, regal angelfish, coral trout and the archerfish, associated with Baron Münchhausen’s tale about a fish that could spit. One in the University of Queensland apparently used to spit in unsuspecting visitors’ eyes (bloke from the research station again).
At least 330 species of ascidians call the Barrier Reef home, boasting a lifestyle anyone could envy. Also known as sea squirts, these little orange creatures are born with a rudimentary central nervous system. In the larval stage they swim around looking for somewhere to settle down. Then, because they don’t need their brains any more, they simply eat them. I’m sure we all know people like that, as I remarked to the research-centre bloke. We clinked our glasses in agreement.
On board the little Cessna aircraft, which wobbled its way over the turquoise waters of the Pacific to Lizard Island, about an hour’s flight northeast of Cairns, I read in my copy of the Cairns Post, with more than passing interest, that three people had been eaten by great white sharks off Queensland the previous weekend.
Sharks, those premier-league carnivores, keep up an unnerving presence everywhere on the reef. Not all are great whites, of course. Black-tip reef sharks, dorsal fins slicing through the surface in a Jaws-like fashion, are a common sight.
They’re content enough in the shallows – a little more than 30cm of water will do. Which means that even if you’re just paddling, you can easily come face to face with one. Not to worry (too much). They don’t attack humans.
Box jellyfish do, however. These bundles of misery spell trouble. If one comes visiting and finds you unprepared – with no protective stinger suit on – then you’re likely to die in abject wretchedness.
The stonefish is another reef resident you don’t really want to meet. My little book of handy hints for Queensland says: “The sting, a massive dose of myotoxin, causes excruciating pain and a great deal of swelling, rapidly causing death to tissues. The severity of the symptoms depends on the depth of penetration. The symptoms are muscle weakness, temporary paralysis and shock, which may result in death.” Sounds like you’ll need the flying doctor sharpish.
But never mind that. Here comes the speedboat with lunch on board. The beauty of staying on Lizard Island is that you choose one of the 24 beaches as your private strand for the day. Install yourself on the white powdery sands – washed by warm azure waters that reflect the surrounding bougainvillea and oleanders – then send for the messages. The boat will duly deliver champagne, lobster, prawns – the biggest you’ll ever see – cheeses, wine . . . all to be consumed in tropical warmth.
Sharks and champagne are an unbeatable combination, let me tell you. Fear is banished, and merriment and bravado take over. As you quaff another glass of bubbly and insert a forkful of terrine de poisson in your maw, you’ll be, like, “Oh yeah? You and whose army?” to every passing grey nurse shark, saltwater crocodile or blue-ringed octopus.
Uh oh. Did I not mention the octopuses with the blue ring? Relentless pain, cardiac palpitations, fairly quick death. But you already guessed that.
You don’t need to travel as far as Lizard Island – the most northerly landfall of the Great Barrier Reef – to meet the myriad residents of the Pacific. Day trips from Cairns take about 45 minutes to reach the reef; alternatively, stay in more modest lodgings on the Whitsundays, where camping is an option.
From here it’s a short journey to pontoons anchored on the reef, where you can snorkel, scuba dive, go on a Scuba-Doo underwater scooter – terrific, if somewhat unsettling, fun – take a ride in a semi-submersible craft, paddle a glass-bottomed canoe or merely stare out from the pontoon’s underwater viewing chamber, muttering profanities of disbelief at this world of extreme zoology and botany.
Cairns is the departure point for seaplane flights across the Great Barrier. From this vantage point you get soul-healing panoramas of the reef: the freshly laundered blue of the Pacific, palm-fringed islands, pods of dolphins, impossibly beautiful lagoons.
Reef-exploring done, a skirmish into downtown Cairns is something of an adventure in itself: 1,600km from the state capital, Brisbane, it is surrounded by ocean, rainforest and desert. And yet the crack is a very creditable 90 – with gusts up to 110 – seemingly all the time.
Green Island also mixes hedonistic pleasures with natural history. It’s a 45-minute ferry ride from Cairns, and you can walk around the entire island in half an hour, just like Captain Cook did when he came visiting. After that it’s a toss-up between spending hours gawping from the underwater observatory, identifying the Southern Cross on a star-gazing odyssey or spotting ghost crabs at dead of night.
If you find that all a bit exhausting, relax. After a hard day setting your inner David Attenborough free, you can sit out in the sweet night air – whether you’re camping on the Whitsundays or living it large on Lizard – order a cocktail and wait for the nightly chorus of crickets to begin.
** Mal Rogers was a guest of Tourism Queensland (www.queenslandholidays.com.au), Lizard Island and Green Island resorts
Go there
Aer Lingus (www.aerlingus. com) flies from Dublin, Cork and Belfast to London Heathrow, from where Singapore Airlines (www.singaporeair.com) flies to Brisbane. Qantas (www.qantas.com.au) and Hinterland Aviation (www. hinterlandaviation.com.au) serve Cairns and the Great Barrier Reef islands.
Where to stay and eat if you're off the reef
Where to stay
Lizard Island. 00-61-2-82968010, www.lizardisland.com.au. A stylish bolt-hole that offers outrageous decadence. The resort’s lodge bar is the sort of place where your wine comes in a glass the size of a goldfish bowl. The sumptuous suites even have a pillow menu; I ordered the lot. Not cheap, though, at about €800 (all in) per couple per night.
Hamilton Island. www.hamiltonisland.com.au. Hamilton Island, one of the Whitsundays, can be a bit of a shock: think Benidorm on the Great Barrier Reef, with a 21-storey hotel, thrumming discos, bands with awesomely bad versions of Eagles hits and barbies on the beach. Activities are numerous: as well as exploring the reef, you can jet ski, sail, canoe, sailboard, raft or go-kart.
Whitsundays. Half a dozen Whitsunday islands (not Hamilton) offer camping. Contact Queensland Parks Wildlife (www.epa.qld.gov. au).
Hayman Island. 00-61-7-49401234 or 00-44-20-85452615, www.hayman.com.au. The most exclusive resort on the Whitsundays. There are few places better to sample the reef’s colour and light show.
Green Island Resort. 00-61-7-40313300, www. greenislandresort.com.au. The island is partially open to day-trippers; they have to clear off by 4.30pm, after which the resort reverts to its exclusivity. Split-level suites, each with a balcony overlook the steamy rainforest. A boardwalk leads, of course, to a swimming pool. About €220 per suite per night.
Shangri-la. Pierpoint Road, Cairns, 00-61-7-40311411, www.shangri-la.com. If you don’t want to stay on an island or an atoll, then the Shangri-la in Cairns, with its overload of luxury, is a fine alternative. Epic views across the harbour, a balcony on which to sit out steamy tropical nights, and a top-notch restaurant. Doubles from about €150.
Where to eat
Ochre Restaurant. 43 Shields Street, Cairns, 00-61-7-40510100, www.redochregrill.com.au. Modern Aussie cuisine, which means kangaroo, crocodile and emu served with panache. Don’t bother with the old “A kangaroo steak, and hop to it” routine. They’ve heard it already. Ditto “a crocodile sandwich, and make it snappy”.
Khin Khao Restaurant. 21 Aplin Street, Cairns, 00-61-7-40318581, www.khinkhao.com. Authentic Thai restaurant, and about the best in Cairns. Has a range of seafood specialities, as well as classic coconut curries.
When to go
“Turned out nice again” is a phrase you’ll be needing a lot in Queensland. Average daily temperatures range from just over 23 degrees in the winter months of June and July up to 32 degrees in December, during the height of the summer.